Update- Jaden 5 years and twins 4 months

Time is really flying by. Jaden turned 5 on the 20th of August and had an angry birds themed birthday party. He was really pleased with the gifts he got. I had to work the night before and the night of the party so I didn't get to spend as much time with him as I wanted to. Of course, there's never enough time! We are starting school on Tuesday after Labor Day- I'll be sure to blog about that.

Jaden had his 5 year check up yesterday. He weighs 38 lbs and is in the 25th percentile for both height and weight. That means that 75% of kids his age are bigger and 25% are smaller. He is very proportional. He didn't get any shots but they stuck his finger to test his hemoglobin and he was extremely unhappy about that. We spoke with the doctor about his developmental delay and some behavior concerns. She wants us to go back to the psychologist for further testing. She says some of his issues sound like maybe add/adhd and he still has some tendencies from the autism spectrum but she doesn't diagnose these disorders. First we see what the psychologist thinks, then in 3 months follow up with the regular pediatrician and depending on what the psychologist says maybe get a referral for a developmental pediatrician. Honestly, I would rather him see the developmental pediatrician than the psychologist... but we'll see what they say.

We also got a referral for a physical therapy evaluation. Jadens hips are still super tight from the w-sitting and he is significantly behind in gross motor and fine motor skills. The skills have improved a ton in occupational therapy but he's still behind.

I also talked to the doctor about his picky eating and sensory issues with food. She referred us to speech therapy for a swallow study. He was evaluated by speech already and it wasn't indicated that he had issues. And he has no problems swallowing so I don't think we're gonna be doing that. It's just a sensory thing.

Jaden then failed his eye exam. Another referral! This time for a pediatric optometrist to see if he needs glasses.

I think that's all for Jaden.

The twins had their 4 month checkup yesterday. Kyler is 13 lbs 5oz and Kason is 13 lbs 9oz! It was really surprising because I thought Kason was so much bigger than Kyler. Their heads are exactly the same size and Kason is a quarter of an inch taller.

I asked about Kylers cradle cap. He has the worst cradle cap I've ever seen and got a prescription for a steroid cream for it.

I had her look in their mouths to make sure there was no thrush because my nipples are in really bad shape. Kason has basically shredded them with lazy latching. They are both cracked and bleeding in more than one place. But no thrush. Teething hardcore for sure. Mother in law bought an amber necklace- we are hoping it helps.

Kason has what looks like some extra skin on his penis, so he got a referral to a urologist. I think our doctors just refer out all of our problems! All 4 boys are circumcised and if there's any penis issues I want to get them fixed now while they're babies.

The doctor is very pleased with their growth. They are still exclusively breast fed and I don't plan on starting solids until at least 6 months. The doctor said it was ok to try if I wanted to but after extensive research I have decided to delay solids and I'm leaning towards baby led weaning with a little modification.

They got 5 vaccinations each (4 shots and an oral) and it was hoooorrrriibblllleeee. Ugh. Their poor little legs! I thought I might faint.

Little Gage is the only one that didn't have an appointment. He's doing great though- love him so much. Not much to update on with him! He is getting really tall though.

I hope I didn't forget anything. I'll be writing again about Jadens first day of kindergarten soon! Love y'all.

Dear Jaden, a letter to my son

For as far back as I can remember, I wished for you. I dreamed of your existence when I was 5. I never wanted anything more than I wanted you.

When I found out I was pregnant, it was the most amazing feeling. It was scary and wonderful at the same time. My life was at a standstill and I didn't know where you would fit in, but I knew that you would. I didn't know it, but I had a Jaden-shaped hole in my heart and it was your perfect place.

It took me a long time to bond with you but when I did, it was intense. We've been inseparable ever since!

I'm supposed to be teaching you about life, but you teach me everyday what life really is. I hope I never stop learning from you. I love seeing the world through your eyes. Your tiny little self grew me up. I have never before worried like I worry over you.

I know you are going to go far and succeed in whatever you want to do. You are already driven and detail oriented. Your memory is a special gift- I've never met anyone with a memory like yours. Use it well. Everywhere we go, you make a friend. Never lose that love for other people.

I love to just watch you exist. I have watched you breathe, watched you sleep, watched you grow before my very eyes. You make me proud everyday. You love so passionately, sometimes you can't even handle it. You're just a little guy, have patience with yourself and others. Be kind and forgiving, especially to yourself.

I love to hear you sing, watch you dance, listen to you talk. You brought our family together... done so much in a short time. You just turned 5 and though I love to watch you grow and enjoy you more and more everyday, I wish you would stay my innocent little baby forever. Luckily, you will ALWAYS be mommy's precious baby.

Stand tall, my first born son. You are far more important than you realize, loved no matter what, cared about by so many.

I love you and your brothers equally, but I will have always loved you the longest.

I'll peek into your bed in the morning, watch you breathe and sleep. Put your blankey near your mouth to get a glimpse of your sucky face. "Pet" your back and cover you up. And enjoy every minute of you!

Dear Gage, a letter to my son

Dear Gage,
I wanted you before you even existed. When I found out I was pregnant, I was thrilled! I wanted another little boy, and I knew your name would be Gage. You were the perfect addition to our little family. When you were inside me, you kicked so hard! When you came, you had to go to NICU for respiratory distress and it broke my heart. You were fine though, and soon safely in my arms.

Breastfeeding did not go well, you ended up with blood in your stool and really unhappy. I had to switch to hypoallergenic formula to make your tummy better. However, I still bonded with you, my little fusspot. You cried all the time until you were one and I couldn't do much for you. We cuddled a lot.

You have this perfect little porcelain round face. It earned you the nickname "little gagey round face". Even your eyes are perfectly round and were blue for so long. When you were born your hair was strawberry blond, now it's brown like the rest of ours.

You have always loved doing everything your big brother Jaden does. You still love to cuddle. You love to cook and do laundry and dishes. You are my right hand man.

My little sensitive sweet Gage, you are the best big brother ever. You love your little brothers more than I ever thought possible. You are only 3 years old and you seem 10 the way you take care of them. Mommy is so unbelievably proud of you. I love the person you are, the child you are growing into, and the man you will one day become. You have already made me so proud in so many ways. I can't wait to watch you grow and learn and I thank God everyday that I get to be here for this, and I thank God for you.

Gage Davis McKinnon, you are loved. You are cherished. You are wanted, always.

I will kiss your sweet face in the morning.

Love, Mommy

Growing up

Everyone's growing up so fast! Jadens about to turn 5 and starting kindergarten this year. We are so excited about homeschooling. We joined a homeschool group and we have lots of functions to go to. These are the kids that they're gonna grow up with, gonna be their lifelong friends.

I go back to night shift starting Monday, so happy to get my hours back. It works out much better for my family life and I get to see my boys way more.

Not much else to update on. Still exclusively breastfeeding. All my joints are still sore. Babies are getting huge! Still producing tons of milk. Not much has changed.

Everything's really busy right now. My wonderful sister in law bought me an amazing planner that I just love! Jadens birthdays coming up and that's going to be a lot of fun.

I had a mishap with school and taxes and financial aid so now I have to amend my taxes and start school in January. It shouldn't affect my graduation date though. Just an aggravation. Small bump in the road.

I really can't think of anything else that's going on :) love you all!